Confusion and Contentment
by enBERG
Summary: Clarisse and Joseph throughout the years. Their relationship is confusing at times for both. But they also can be very content to be together at other moments. M rated story, but it's relativeley harmless I suppose. Coveres the timeline from movie I till the end of movie II. Complete.
1. 1 At the consulate garden

**Confusion and Contentment**

Clarisse and Joseph throughout the years. Their relationship is confusing at times for both of them. But they also can be very content to be together at other moments. Starting after the garden scene where Amelia learns that she in fact is the princess of Genovia. You will find a strong and confident Clarisse in my story. I assume that readers have a basic knowledge of the two princess diaries movies. I will just be writing on where scenes in the movie stops.

I don't know yet how far I will be taking this. This is my first fanfiction on this site and my first princess diaries story. But with maybe a 3rd movie coming up I could not stop thinking about our favourite couple. I am thinking forward for chapters yet to be written, so I have selected M as rating to be sure.

Clarisse and Joseph start off with a colleague relationship which is already good. Which can grow into something more than that. That seems to make more sense to me than two people being in love for years and years.

Although I like to play around with the characters, Princess Diaries is not mine. And I certainly do not make money with writing fanfiction. If that was the case I could stop working at the office.

And by the way, English is my second language. But of course, I will do my best to avoid grammar and spelling mistakes. I hope you like reading it.

**1\. At the consulate garden.**

Joseph was confused and getting more irritated every passing second. While still in Genovia a week ago he already realised that the meeting Clarisse scheduled with her granddaughter would be interesting. But that he would be involved at any other level than that of head of security he would not have guessed. This was madness. Sure, he had fallen again for her charms and agreed with her suggestion after a few questions. And for sure the girl, Amelia was nice and sweet, and they would probably cope fine together. But how could Clarisse come up with this really? After what they had discussed yesterday?

But on the other hand… Ever since he could remember Clarisse had always been in for surprises. Good and bad ones, or both at the same time. Like that evening when she tried to escape from a dinner party by pretending she was about to faint. As if a strong woman like Clarisse would faint so easily… A small smile appeared around his mouth while remembering what had happened next. When he had escorted Clarisse safely back to the already waiting car, he had told her that she could stop pretending. She had miraculously recovered strait away and had asked to be driven back to the palace.

In time it had become an inside joke between them that he used to tease her with. When he had to do something that he did not like he told her that he could always pretend to faint… The thought at something that he did not like brought him back in the present time.

While thinking about the past Joseph had lost track of Clarisse's whereabouts for a second. But after a quick look around the garden he noticed that she already made it back inside the consulate. Getting more and more irritated about the change of his job description he started walking and sped up in order to catch up with her. If he did not talk with her now the opportunity of the first reaction would be lost.

During the flight to America Clarisse came to realise that Amelia probably needed some instruction. How to behave, walk, sit and talk like a princess. Even though she was excited about finally meeting her only granddaughter her focus has been the throne of Genovia.

But after meeting Amelia five minutes ago she knew that the biggest hurdle would be gaining Amelia's trust and dealing with the girl's confusion about this whole new situation. Her sons had been teenagers years ago and she had forgotten how insecure teenagers could be. She felt lost when it came to this subject. With her own boys she had been able to settle issues with love and patience. But she barely knew her granddaughter…

Being queen for half her life she always had to suppress her feelings and follow the rules of property while dealing with others. It was almost impossible to gain friends quickly. Real friends. Of course, there was a whole bunch of people wo called themselves her friends. But that were not the people who supported her when Rupert died… That were not the people who came to her with personal issues. Slightly panicking about the relationship with her granddaughter she realised that she should be very happy with her head of security.

Their relationship was one of the surprises that life came up with sometimes. Until Rupert's death Joseph had been a good employee, a very good one. But during her early mourning days he had been the one looking through the façade. It started with small gestures like an extra cup of tea on her desk. Clarisse was very happy that Joseph agreed to help her with Amelia.

At that same moment she hears Joseph call after her "Your majesty!" She turned to face him and stopped her musings about her granddaughter. "When I am to be a chauffeur and babysitter for the girl, I think it's a good idea to be clear about the expectations." He looked irritated and she did not understand why that was exactly. "Very well then" she replied. "Let's sit down for ten minutes and discuss whatever you have on your mind." Clarisse walked towards the queen's office at the end of the hallway with Joseph on her heels. While taking a seat behind the desk in her office Joseph closed the door.

"Clarisse" he started off immediately. "I will do as you asked and look out for your granddaughter, but you realise that I only can help her to a certain extent, do you? I mean, I can't help her becoming a princess. I can't teach her all about the country's history. She is a girl for heaven's sake, I don't know a thing about young girls. And besides I am not family! Even if she starts relying on me it doesn't make any sense at all."

She tried to interrupt his waterfall of words but that was a catalysator for Joseph who fell his frustration grow. He turned around facing the other wall in order to keep his emotions at bay and to not start shouting. At which he failed.

"WE TALKED ABOUT THIS JUST YESTERDAY! I am getting older, I must slow down with my activities and hand over the physical work to the younger guys. Stop taking those night shifts. Spare my knees! YOU AGREED! And now you burden met with extra responsibilities that are not even in the range of my job description! How can I rely on anything if you can't stick to a plan more than one day? I…"

Joseph stopped talking abruptly because he felt a female hand on each of his shoulders. This was new. They had touched of course. But it was always him making contact with Clarisse. Helping her out of a car, guiding her trough a mass of people with his hand on her back or holding her elbow.

"You are right I did not consider your personal wishes. It's just that I am confused as well. I turned to you because I know I can always rely on your support. I did not mean to be inconsiderate."

With that Joseph turned around to look Clarisse in the eye and because of the movement Clarisse took her hands of Josephs shoulders. Clarisse took a step back so that they were now a meter apart from each other. While Joseph continued looking annoyed Clarisse had a serious expression on her face.

"I don't exactly know how to continue from here. I do realise that I must be the one to get to know Amelia and to persuade her to accept the title. To prepare her and help her where I can. But I am not good at this." A pleading look showed on her face.

Josephs look turned cynical. "I am sure you can…"he started.

"No please let me finish."Clarisse interrupted.

"I am not the person to get to know people easily. You know me good enough to agree on that. And now after the death of Philippe I am even more distant than normal. It will take me months or even years before I have a good relationship with Amelia. Remember when we met for the first time? It took me months to see your good characteristics and much longer before we could talk on first name basis."

Grasping for breath she continued.

"But you on the other hand are very easy meeting new people and earning their trust. Please Joseph, you're are the only colleague that I can think of that can help me out. Will you please look after her and chauffeur her around?"

Joseph sighted and walked towards the balcony doors that where behind the queen's desk.

"You indeed are not very good at making new acquaintances" he said.

He heard her chuckle and he relaxed a bit. He was already ashamed for his shouting. It was as easy as one and one is two to realise that Clarisse would never ask something like this without a good reason. And after the support he got from her lately to tame his personal crisis he owed her something.

"I will do as I promised before in the garden. I will be the chauffeur and babysitter and if you wish a confidential person. But only for the time here in America. And this is the last time I am taking on extra work."

With that he smiled. Clarisse was content with that answer, so she came to stand next to Joseph to oversee the garden.

"Thank you, Joseph. I am happy to be able to rely on someone. With Rupert gone for some time now... You know how it is."

She paused a while before she continued.

"But Joseph…"He looked at her in response. "When we are back in Genovia you are taking a holiday. It's not normal you know. To start shouting like that."

The look that Joseph saw on the queen's face left no room for negotiation.

"It's all right to let your temper go every now and then. But you must realise that I still am your queen."

He turned his head quickly to the left to look at her face. What he found was a neutral expression by which it was hard to tell what she was thinking. At the point where he thought they were on the same page he was confused again.

It was months ago since she played the queen card on him. Since they had shared some private talks after the king's death their personal relationship had improved enormously. After the unforeseen death of prince Philippe, they started spending more and more time together. Long evenings of talking about joyful times and present grief.

It was not a one-sided relation in which the queen confided in him. The last two weeks he found that he could also rely on her. Joseph needed someone to talk to when his love life reached a bottom point. He became depressed when he realised that after having a few relationships he was again single, old and childless. His last girlfriend leaving the dinner table during their last date did not help to brush up his self-esteem. Clarisse helped him to put things in perspective, summed up a list of things that he did achieve and told him he could rely on her for help.

Most of the time when it considered work-related issues Clarisse asked him what he wanted. So, Joseph was clueless about her 'I am your boss' remark. After his initial surprise Joseph stared to feel confused.

Meanwhile Clarisse was struggling to keep her composure. But when Josephs face turned from surprised to shocked, she couldn't keep the smile from her face. When Joseph realised he was played at, he stated laughing. "I believed you for a second" he said relieved. "But you are right Clarisse. It's good that we can rely on each other. But at work it is also good to talk to each other about business and keep everyone on the edge."

With that he walked to the door with the words "I am off, using the afternoon to read some holiday brochures."

While moving up the stairs he realised that he was about to get to know the future queen of Genovia as good as he knew her grandmother.


	2. 2 The Wango

This chapter is a bit short compared to C1. I don't know if I am happy with how it turned out. But I decided to post it anyway and see where this is going from here. I will try to have a fixed moment in the week to write on this to keep up some progress.

**2\. The wango**

The reason Joseph had asked Clarisse to dance with him was because he knew that she was struggling with her feelings lately. She waited for years to finally see and get to know her granddaughter. She was happy because of that. At the same time there was an internal fight going on between the Queen of Genovia and the woman Clarisse. A fight for attention between educating the heir into a proper princess and getting to know her granddaughter on a personal level.

But it was a fact that getting to know Amelia brought joy to the Queen. Every member of staff noticed that the Queen was more relaxed and more talkative then she had been the past year.

It was probably only Joseph who realised that there was a second struggle going on inside the head of the most powerful woman of Genovia. King Rupert only passed away a year ago. To an outsider a year might seem long. But when you have to say goodbye to your husband that you lived together with for many years, a year is nothing.

The loss of a partner was one thing. But the loss of a child… Parents should not survive their children. Ever since Philippe died that had cut a hole that could not be restored.

While dancing on autopilot, Joseph looked down on Clarisse. He realised that she was a beautiful woman. She felt warm under his hands, even trough the fabric of her black attire. He hoped that his remark about her wearing black for too long would push her in the right direction. The direction of letting go the past, and while still respecting her husband moving on with her life. Enjoy the pleasure of seeing her granddaughter every day and not feeling guilty about the happiness that she felt because of that.

Clarisse noticed that Joseph was looking at her. And she realised that se did not minder. It had a calming affect on her. It felt good to just dance and have soothing physical contact. Even though it was not a dance for lovers, there was a romantic atmosphere in the air. Clarisse found that she missed the contact with Joseph already. That confused her. Was she attracted to Joseph?

Before she could give it more serious thought the song ended and the next one started to play. Both Clarisse and Joseph stopped dancing and they stepped backwards to create some distance between them.

Whereas they had been quiet during the dance Joseph started speaking. "Respect the dead Clarisse, but don't forget to live today. Don't feel guilty about the joy you feel when you see the princess".

Clarisse managed to shake her confusion off for the moment and produced a smile. "I know I should move on. But it's not easy for an old woman to put the past away easily."

"You are not that old" Joseph replied.

"I'm a grandmother, so yes, I am old." Clarisse said.

Joseph smiled back.

"Thank you for your words Joseph. This battle is going on inside me for some time now. But now that I hear from you to live today, I think I dare to take the step and start enjoying more."

Clarisse moved and walked over to the table to gather the documents she had been working on before the dance. "Even though dancing is quite relaxing, I am afraid we both should focus our attention back to work. Amelia makes me happier than I have been in months. But still there is a lot of work to do before the Renaldi bloodline is safe."

Joseph was sorry that the nice moment of personal talk was over. But he knew Clarisse was right. So, he picked up the subject that he wanted to discuss.

"Well about work. As discussed, I wrote a plan which makes it possible for me to concentrate more on the security planning and less on the execution of it. It's almost finished. When would you like to go over it so that you know the details?"

Clarisse kept looking at the documents in front of her. "When? Well for the answer to that questions I would suggest that you consult Charlotte. But I would say somewhere to coming two weeks."

Josepg nodded in response.

"I must say that I will miss you being around as bodyguard. But I understand that it's normal for people in security business to stop with the physical work at a certain age."

Joseph looked from Clarisse to his shoes and back and doubted for a second. He could just let the subject be. But he knew he had to address it at some point in time. Better do it now.

"Clarisse. There is another reason that it's a bad idea that I continue to be your bodyguard."

She looked up from the table in surprise.

"It's unsafe and therefore unwise that bodyguards befriend their employer. When an unsafe situation occurs, the security guard must act based on protocol and not based on a personal relationship."

Joseph held his breath while waiting for this news to sink in. They both knew that they developed a friendship lately. But it was never mentioned out loud.

Clarisse was silent for a second. She was thinking that at least her feeling that their connection grew was not one sided. Then she replied in a soft voice. "I am glad to have you as a friend. I feel stupid that I did not realise the safety risk myself. I am glad you did."

"Well that is part of the job I would say" Joseph replied calmly. But inside his head something snapped into place. She acknowledged their friendship! Now that it was out in the open it was a relief

"Is it an issue that you stay on as head of security?" Clarisse hoped that the answer on her question would be no. The idea of saying goodbye to Joseph was not a nice idea.

Joseph saw the uneasiness spreading across the Queens face and was happy that he could give a reassuring answer. "No that won't be a problem when I leave the execution of the safety measures to others." He got serious. His insight was important, but the decision remained with Clarisse. "But when you have any doubts…"

She interrupted "I can count on it that you have all the plans double checked by someone else?"

"Yes of course, as always, but when you feel…."

"Let's just move on then. And I guess you will still remind me when I try to undermine my security?"

While Charlotte came walking into the ballroom Clarisse and Joseph both looked in her direction. Joseph was somehow both sad and relieved that this meeting was over and replied, "You can count on that."

"Your majesty, it's almost time for your 6 o'clock meeting" Charlotte mentioned.

"Ah yes of course. If you can pick up those documents and put them in the right folders? I will walk ahead to the meeting room."

Clarisse turned to Joseph and asked, "how long will it take before the new security measure are in place?"

"At least until we are back in Genovia. I need to pick men from the existing team and get them worked in on their new positions. It will take a month or so before everyone is settled."

Clarisse nodded her approval and with that she said her goodbyes to Joseph and made her way across the consulate towards her meeting.

The idea that she now officially had a new friend make her feel happy and content. The little tingling feeling of romance that had been in the air during her dance with Joseph made her feel confused. Oh, come on she reminder herself, you are the Queen for heavens sake! You have managed series of difficult speeches, grumpy men from parliament and the death of your son. What are you worrying about? It was just one silly dance, not a love declaration.


	3. 3 After the mustang ride

Chapter 3. Moving forward. Decided to have a little fluff coming in. Not too much yet. They sort of realise that there is a romantic spark, but without a clue of where this is going.

**3\. After the mustang ride**

Joseph sat quietly in the dark overthinking last week events.

There had been the makeover of the princess which made Clarisse very happy. Then the media circus at school which brought up the best of the queen. The state dinner which also brought up the best of the queen that Clarisse was, but probably also the worst of the grandmother that Clarisse was as well.

She started wearing colours again.

The idea made a warm feeling spread through his body. Funny enough the warmth made him shiver. Quickly he set aside the feeling and reminded himself about the events from today.

He started to get fond of the princess. She was clumsy and talked too much. She was friendly and looked beautify after the makeover. But mainly she was still very young and therefore very uncertain about herself. He could tell that Amelia was looking up to Clarisse and wanted to make her happy. While doing her best she got more and more nervous and then more and more silly accidents happened. Which made the queen unhappy, which made the princess even more nervous, and so on.

He totally agreed with Clarisse's plan to set aside the queen and princess and spend time together as granddaughter and grandmother. He liked it. It was good for Amelia and it was maybe even better for Clarisse. Amelia was nervous about acting like a royal. Clarisse on the other hand was nervous about acting like family. Amelia might not realise. But while she received princess lessons from the queen, she herself was giving lessons in friendship to her grandmother. Amelia's unrestricted behaviour helped Clarise to overstep her difficulties with making friends.

Yes, Joseph totally agreed with Clarisse's idea to spend time with her granddaughter and to skip her other appointments for the day.

He agreed with the idea. Not with the way things turned out today. Yes, Clarisse liked to go against the status quo every now and then. But it always was a minor joke without too much harm. And more important, it always involved herself.

Today however she had asked the princess to take her out into the city. Without taking him or any other security along. Besides that, she just left the building without even informing the security office or anyone where they were going. And then the car! It was barely safe enough to drive in, Amelia had no driving licence, nor had Clarisse.

He had been angry at first, but after that feeling passed, he was mainly concerned. When he saw the police, car stop at the consulate and Clarisse and the princess getting out of the car he was relieved. He had to admit that the safety risks were low. Granted, the accident with the trolley was unfortunate. They could have been hurt! But that did not happen and as always, the queen of Genovia solved the problem in a very diplomatic way. The morning papers would most likely present a positive and romantic story about a strong queen and not a bad story about a rebellious princess.

The head of security needed to have a serious talk with the queen about safety risks. But that could wait till the next day or the day after that. The reason he was sitting here was because Joseph wanted to confront his friend Clarisse. He felt that she betrayed their recent found friendship.

Clarisse walked towards her suite. It had been an eventful day. She regretted the accident. But she was happy with her decision to spend time with Amelia away from the consulate. She started to like the girl that was her granddaughter. Slowly she learned to lower her guard. It made her happy that she could. She realised that her whole state of being was better than it had been weeks ago. For a big part that was because of her granddaughter. And she even stared wearing colours again!

Joseph.

The thought of Joseph reminded her of the thing nagging around in her head since she left the consulate. She did not inform him. She did not ask her head of security how to deal with the day out in San Francisco. But more important she did not inform her friend. She asked him to set aside his normal work and help her with Amelia. And she decided not to talk to him about precisely the decision to try and build a friendly relationship with her granddaughter.

At first, she thought that maybe he would not be upset about it and that she would be able to set things right quickly. But she was back for a few hours now, and Joseph was nowhere to be found. She had to come to terms with the fact that she would have to wait till the morning to talk with him. She hoped she had not damaged their friendship along the way trying to build another.

Meanwhile Clarisse reached her suite and opened the door. Automatic lights turned on while she walked towards the bedroom. While she extended her hand towards her bedroom door, she felt a hand on her shoulder. The hand was firm and turned her around.

"What is this supposed to…"

"Enjoyed your adventure today?" Joseph spoke very punctuated, but in a low voice so that the guards outside would not be able the hear him speak.

"Joseph, I did not realise you where there. You scare me." Clarisse release her breath.

"Yes, it was my intention to scare you a little, as to remind you of what could happen if you totally ignore your security. What did you think this morning?"

Clarisse sighted. "From the moment I left with Amelia I knew I was wrong not telling you. I'm sorry and I won't surpass you again."

Joseph still had his hand on Clarisse's shoulder, but his tight grip loosened. This was not what he expected of this confrontation. Her apology took away his anger. For a moment he did not know how to respond.

"I told you I wasn't too good with friendships." Clarisse said. She stared to her shoes to avoid Joseph's eyes.

Joseph found back his voice in the silence that followed. "I don't know what to say really. I expected some sort of fight, not an apology."

Still looking at the ground Clarisse answered: "Can you accept my apology? I promise that it is sincere, not just a diplomatic move."

Joseph looked at Clarisse and noticed her choice of attire. It was cream coloured, not black. He left his hand on her shoulder, but with the other he touched her chin in a way so that she had to turn her head to face him.

"I accept your apology and I will keep you to your promise not to surpass me again. And I want to tell you that it makes me happy to see you wearing colours."

Relief made its way through Clarisse's body.

"Thank you and thank you for advising me on the colours. It makes me happy too."

While looking Joseph in the eye, Clarisse was very aware of both of his hand touching her. After dancing with Joseph last week, she scolded herself about a certain romantic feeling that she must have made up. But now, looking at Joseph, she wasn't so sure the imagination part. Where was this going?

Where was this going? Joseph had no coherent thought as to why he was so bold to touch Clarisse in this quite intimate way. Friends touch each other's hands, arms and maybe they hug. But they rarely touch each other's face. Parents touch the face of their children, yes. But when you see adults touch each other's face, they most of the time are in a romantic relationship together.

But in this moment Joseph decided to just feel and enjoy the moment, so he kept his hand where they were. Meanwhile he waited to see how Clarisse would respond to this.

Clarisse couldn't stand the tension any longer. She moved her hands to catch both of Joseph's and moved them in-between their bodies. Still holding hands, she said: "I really want to catch some sleep now. Can we continue talking later?"

With a mixture of regret of the lost contact, but happy for the physical connexion that was still there for a short moment Joseph looked down at their connected hands. He realised that he was content with the feeling of Clarisse's hand in his, and that he was at the same moment completely confused about where this was going. He also realised that whatever the future held in store for him, a romantic relation to whatever extend with Clarisse was never going to be easy. But the fact that she was still holding both of his hands told him that he did not go too far.

This was not something to discuss now. He needed some time to think about this, so he replied: "Yes. I will see you in the morning in your office with business as usual." Then he squeezed her hands for a moment before letting go and he went to the door and left the suite.

Clarisse looked at the door that closed after Joseph just seconds ago. It was a long time ago that she had been so confused and so content at the same time. Because of her arranged marriage to Rupert, she never had the change to build a romantic relationship from scratch. She loved the fact that she finally felt a little bit of the feeling that she had been reading about in books for whole her life. She was desperate to grab this chance and to see where this would lead to. At the same time this, whatever it was, was terrifying and complicated her live even more.


	4. 4 After the Independence Day ball

Chapter 4. I have ten or more ideas about how this should continue in next chapters. But in this one I decided to move their relationship a little more towards a romance.

**4\. After the Independence Day ball. **

They just walked out of the ballroom together. Both silent and in their own thoughts.

Clarisse on the one hand wanted to reprimand Joseph. Both for his remark about the garden where Amelia went with her friend, as well about the fact the he just sent his men away so that he could grab her hand and hiss the back of it.

On the other hand, she liked the feeling of holding hands with Joseph. She had registered that a few times now. So why denying it? On a normal day she would probably tell herself that she was a Queen, that she had to keep decorum. But it was not a normal day. Amelia just agreed to become Genovia's princess. Which was very good news. Both to the Queen of the same country, but also very much for Clarisse in her role as grandmother.

She sighted while Joseph led her trough the dark palace halls. She realised that she really came to like her granddaughter. She was looking forward to her visits, Christmases and even to more and more 'princess lessons' the would surely follow. She felt so happy in her core that she forgot to think about what was in her head. Duty, decorum, being a wise woman.

While drowning in the feeling of joy she looked sideways at Joseph. She realised that she wanted to know tonight. That she wanted to give room to the romantic feeling. She wanted to know if he felt the same. Suddenly she hated playing safe. Her happiness temporarily took away her fear. The feeling grew and when Joseph finally came to a halt in front of the library door, she started to feel brave and adventurous.

Joseph released her hand and opened the door so that she could walk in first. While she moved to site at the couch, she looked at him closing and locking the door and walking towards her. She released that he suddenly looked a bit shy.

"Clarisse, I… I realise that it's a bold move from me to take you out here" Joseph started.

He looked at her to decide if she was in a good mood. But he found no evidence on her face for approval nor disapproval. So, he continued.

"I think, I feel… The last weeks I have been quite confused about.. well about us".

He had been pacing but he came to a hold now. Standing in front of her, but not daring to come closer. She still did not respond. Not with words, not with facial expression. And he started to worry.

Since the moment in her suite after the car incident he had been thinking about his feelings. And the moments where he felt that their friendship might turn into something more. He doubted, well, almost everything. His inability to keep long term romantic relations. Facts like her being a queen, her being his employer. But that were all long-term questions and potential issues. What he doubted the very most at this moment was if she felt the same.

He did not know yet if he was in love with her or if he wanted a relationship or something alike with her. But what he knew was that there was some electric spark between them. At least, he felt it. And he had to know, he just had to know, if he was the only one who felt it.

If the answer was no, he had to continue with his life and just set it aside. But if the answer was yes, he wanted to address it. Discuss whatever it was and acknowledge that it was there. He felt that only if they both acknowledged the feeling, only then, there would be room for the 'how to continue with this' discussion.

"Clarisse, please say something?"

She kept silent. But she smiled brightly at him. Which encouraged him to continue. To confess to her what had been in his mind for weeks now.

"I just want to let you know that I… I feel something when I am with you. I don't know what it is exactly. But I…I can't…I wanted to ask… if, if, well... If you feel something as well."

Clarisse chuckled at his words and patted the couch next to her as to ask him to come over and sit next to her.

Joseph moved over and sat down next to Clarisse. They were quite close, but not touching.

Clarisse turned a little on the couch so that she was facing Joseph. She stared taking off her gloves and draped them over the backrest. Then she reached over to him to grasp his both hands and moved towards him so that they were now really close. Then, finally she stared talking.

"I think we have to test the theory we are both having."

She felt bolt and decided to make the best of it. She wanted to kiss Joseph now that he confessed that he felt the spark as well.

So, she leant over to him. In her mind she wanted to do it slow, in order to give him time to stop her from doing it. But in reality, she moved fast and determined. When her lips toughed his she felt the now familiar feeling in her body. This felt right. After a few seconds she felt his surprise turn into passion.

Joseph was completely caught out of guard. He was still considering her statement 'test the theory' one moment, and the next second Clarisse came very close and pressed her lips onto his. After his first moment of surprise he spurs into action. Opening his mouth a little and moving his lips in order to meet with hers. Letting her have her way with the kiss entirely.

He moved his hand from the position in between their bodies in order to pull her closer. He could feel her body warmth trough the fabric of her dress. She was leaning heavily into him now. He started to stroke her back and shoulders. He could smell her familiar scent very good now that she was almost sitting in his lap. Because of the element of surprise he had his eyes open, and because hers were closed he had to opportunity to look at her unrestricted from this very close point of view. She had two little freckles around her nose that he hadn't noticed before.

They interrupted the kiss to gasp for breath. Their foreheads rested against each other.

Joseph let out a small laugh and said: "You keep surprising me. I just wanted to talk about it. Really. Granted, I wanted to kiss you. But I would never have done it. The initiation I mean."

"The best way to move forward with something is to bring it into practice" she replied.

There was a short silence and then Joseph asked "Would you allow me to kiss you again?"

She nodded and offer her mouth to him by tilting her head a little towards him.

Joseph did not let the opportunity pass. Moments before he had allowed her to dictate. Her kiss was good and tender, but he wanted more. He kissed a lot of different woman in his life. And for sure he had a lot more experience with the acts of love then Clarisse had. He wanted to let her feel that he was good at this, that there was more to this.

Joseph moved one of his hands so that he cupped Clarisse's head from the back. With his other hand resting on the small of her back he pulled her very close and held her tight. He pressed his mouth somewhat forcefully against hers and he granted himself access into her mouth with his tongue. She let him in and enjoyed the amount of passion that she now learned could be in a kiss.

Clarisse became anxious at some point and she tried to take over the lead. She enjoyed the feeling of the intimacy, but it was also very much and very intimate for a second kiss. She enjoyed it, but it also confused her a lot. But Joseph wouldn't give in. He just kept kissing her with his lips and tongue and the only thing she could do was to let the warm feeling spread her body.

When Joseph felt her protest against his dominance at some point he decided that he wouldn't let her take over the lead again. He wanted to unchain her passion. He kept her close and this time he leant over her so that she was resting with her back against the couch and he was covering her with his upper body. Her hands in between them resting on his collarbone.

While kissing they both knew that they had to stop at some point. To talk about it. To go to their separate rooms. To get some sleep. But they both wanted to continue for an extra second, an extra small moment, just a little while longer. And to face the issues and all the difficulties later, tomorrow, next year.


	5. 5 Just before returning to Genovia

Chapter 5. Sorry people. They first need a set back before they can move on with their relationship. Otherwise it's just far too easy. And what to do then with the 5 years we have to bridge. I have the uneasy feeling that the chapter is, well…. uneasy. But maybe that's just the way it should be. Like Clarisse and Joseph themselves, I think that I know how to continue this story, but I suddenly don't know jet if that is the right course.

I think that I won't have time next week to write. So, there will be a pause in the updates. But I will pick up the week after.

**5\. Just before returning to Genovia**

Clarisse and Joseph were both in the Queen's office. They had just discussed returning to Genovia and decided that Clarisse would stick to the original schedule. Which meant that she would return to Genovia tonight. Joseph would come on the same plane originally, but together they had decided that it would be better if Joseph would accompany Amelia. The princess would fly over a few days later. She would not accompany her grandmother because royalty never shares the same plane.

After the kiss they had just said their goodbyes and both went to sleep. Or better said, went to bed. It took both of they quite some time to let sleep claim them. Both thinking about the kiss and about what would happen next?

Clarisse was happy that there was no awkwardness between Joseph and herself. They had just moved on where they stopped working the day before the kiss. And she was glad that was the case. Mostly because she knew what she had to tell him, to discuss with him. And this moment was their last chance before she would be back in Genovia, separated for a week or so from Joseph. And there were phones for sure. But this was something to address in person, not via the phone.

Joseph stood from the chair across the desk he was seated in. The meeting was over, so he wanted to go and attend other business he had to look at before Clarisse left tonight.

"Please stay for a moment longer?" Clarisse started.

Joseph looked at Clarisse and gave her a small smile. He knew they had to talk. But he hoped that he could keep the moment away a little longer. He knew which direction this was going. And he feared the moment that he had to tell Clarisse what she did not want to hear.

But he obliged and sat down again. Clarisse herself was still seated in her office chair.

"We have to… no… I want to talk about…what will happen with our private…relation…when we are back home" Clarisse stated somewhat nervous.

Joseph had a hard time keeping his eyes on Clarisse. He in general was not a weak man. But this type of talks, where woman talked about their feelings, it was just not his piece of cake.

It was the story of his life really. When he met a nice lady mostly at some point, they got more intimate. Which was great according to him. But then before he could fathom it, she wanted more, a relationship. It was not that he did not want to have a relationship. The lord knew he wanted it. He already missed his chance on having a family of his own. And it hurt. A lot. It felt like he failed in life one way or another.

But somehow, where he was good at making friends and keeping them for a long period of time, he was not good at romantic relationships. Starting them, no problem at all. Being intimate, having sex, having great holidays together, it all went splendidly.

But keeping the lady satisfied and being happy on the long term, that was the whole issue. There had been numerous reasons for all the breakups in his life. And he still couldn't imagine why it was exactly that he just could not keep a romantic relationship healthy.

What he did know was that his breakups where hard most of the time. When he stared a romantic relationship, eventually, no matter if it were weeks, months or years, that relation would be over and the friendship that first came with it would be gone. He rarely talked with his ex-girlfriends after breakup.

He did not want to lose his friendship with Clarisse. He wanted to stay at the palace until retirement, he was happy and content there. He had been struggling in his head for most of his spare time since their kisses.

Clarisse was beautiful and her kiss was…well, he had some dreams about her. His mind wanted to know how it was to go on a date, spend dinner together, watch a movie. His body wanted to know how it was to have sex with her. He wanted to know what her body looked like without all the makeup and designer outfits. How she would respond on intimate moments.

But he forced himself not to let his mind wander off in that direction now. He knew he had to choose between friendship and romance. And god while he wanted to investigate further on the intimate side of things, his fear to lose his friendship with her took the upper hand. He knew he had to tell her no at some point in time. Now that she addressed it, better do it strait away.

"Joseph? You look far away?" he heard her say.

Joseph stopped staring at Clarisse and took a deep breath.

"Yes, sorry I was lost in thought for a moment. But I did hear you. And before you say something, let me talk first?"

She nodded in response.

"I like you Clarisse I really do. I feel the spark when we are in one room together. And I certainly do not regret kissing you." Joseph kept looking at Clarisse her face to see how she would take in his words. To his surprise she gave him a smile and interrupted him with the words:

"But you feel that we should focus on our friendship, not on a romantic relationship?"

"Yes, I…" He paused for a moment. "How can it be that you always know what I want to tell you?"

She laughed softly.

"It's not that I know what you want to say. It's that I know how I feel about this. And besides that…us not developing a romantic relationship is the most obvious option."

Joseph crossed his legs and sat back in the chair, somewhat relieved.

"I confess I feared that you saw us married and settled already. And I'm just not good with relationships on the romantic side of things. You know all about my broken romances…."

Clarisse raised her brow at that.

"Yes! It's true. I'd rather have you as a good friend than as another one of my ex-girlfriends."

"Well, I did not think of it like that to be honest."

Now Joseph raised his brow. "You did not?"

"No. I am just not ready for a new relationship. I don't wear black any longer, but I still miss Rupert every day. It's just not…there has not been enough time to heal the wounds."

Joseph nodded. "I understand."

"And besides from that. I am only queen because of my marriage with Rupert. The main focus in my life for the coming years will be to educate Amelia. To make her ready for the throne."

"You and your duty all the time…." Joseph sighted.

Clarisse noticed that she was irritated by that last remark. She replied with a slightly raised voice.

"Yes, I understand that it's difficult for you to grasp the concept. But the last three decades of my life I've spend working on this royal duty. It's not easy for me to set it aside now. Especially now. It's my life, not just a simple…how do you name that…crush."

Joseph could not believe his ears.

"Simple crush! That is very unroyal of you to say." He had a twinkle in his eyes as to tempt her to jump on his remark. But she did not.

Silence fell. Both caught up in their separate thoughts.

It was Clarisse who broke the silence after a while.

"So, we just keep going the way we were doing before. Working together and being friends. But nothing more." It was a statement, not a question.

"Yes, that would be best."

"Good."

"Yes, good."

Joseph felt he had to ask.

"Will you still allow me to touch you during work? Guiding you through the mass or…"

"Yes, yes, sure you can. But soon you won't be my bodyguard anymore, remember."

Joseph reminded himself that indeed that was the case. He nodded.

Silence fell again.

"I do feel sad and a little confused I must admit." Clarisse suddenly said while staring at her desk. "I know and feel that being friends with you will make me happier then anything else. But there is this small part of me that…" She stopped talking.

"A small part of you that what?" Joseph probed.

"I…I can't. Just... I don't know. Just leave it be." Feeling that she gave away too much Clarisse stared to retreat. She was not going to confess that she secretly wanted to walk over to him and pull him into a hug.

"Does it help when I tell you that I still will admire you a lot. Seeing a beautiful woman." Joseph tried to encourage her.

"Well…"

Clarisse stared to feel awkward discussing this. She suddenly wanted out of this conversation with Joseph. Not address the spark any longer now that they decided not to give it room. It would be difficult enough.

"Just let's put this behind us. Let's just move on with the day. I have a lot to finish here before I leave."

Joseph sighted.

"All right. If you really don't want to talk about it, I leave it be as you say."

Like Clarisse, Joseph felt uneasiness spreading trough his body. He reminded himself that this was the right path to follow. But while he stood and took the doorknob in his hand, he felt confused. He felt the urge to walk over to her and kiss her. But he had to desist. It would be difficult to ignore the spark. How difficult, time could only tell.


	6. 6 Years later

Chapter 6. During the last two weeks I have been debating about how to continue this. I decided upon a little out of character scene maybe. But I want some fireworks going on. Quite long this time and only from Joseph's POV.

I saw a few typo's and grammar mistakes in the previous chapters. I will update them in the coming weeks.

**6\. Years later. Just before Amelia finishes her education.**

Her mouth was hot and wet on his. She leaned against the inside of his suite door. His right hand rested on the door next to her head. His left hand travelled between her left and right breast. They just came out of bed and had been in the process of getting dressed. Well, they had been dressed, but she started kissing him again and he had opened the top buttons of her blouse so that he could reach inside.

He knew that she only intended to stay this one night. He was not really in search for a one-night stand. But he was only human after all. He needed a warm body against his every now and then. The last weeks when he went out to the bar to meet some friends on Saturday night, she had been there. She looked good and flirted with him. It felt so good to give into it instead of trying to ignore it. So, when she kissed him yesterday, he asked her to come home with him.

She brought him back to the present time by breaking the kiss and saying:

"Thanks to you I now know what the palace looks like from the inside."

Joseph couldn't come up with a decent reply. His mouth stayed open a little bit, still remembering the touch of lips.

"Are you angry with me?" she asked. She bit her bottom lip.

He thought about the question for a moment. Was he angry that she wanted pleasure for one night and that she used him to get access to the palace? He quickly realised that he was not hurt, he was not angry. He found it quite funny.

"No, No I'm not angry. It's all right. I…I had a pleasant night." He smiled.

She laughed out loud before she daringly said:

"Would you care to give me a 10-minute detour?" She stroked his cheek with her fingers. "Now that I have the chance. I mean, I will probably never return here."

Laughing even harder Joseph took her hand in his and pulled her away from the door in order to make room to open it.

"I guess I can take the long route while showing you out."

Both laughing and still half in their embrace they stumbled into the hallway. While doing so they collided with something. Or rather with someone.

In a split-second Joseph reached out for the other person in order to avoid a drop to the ground. He only half succeeded because he also had to steady himself and his date. While the three of them were half on their knees and trying to get onto their feet again he realised who it was they collided onto.

Clarisse. The queen.

His suite was at the end of the hallway that leaded to the queen's suite. Originally, he received this room for safety purposes while he still was working as the queen's personal bodyguard. Back then it made sense to be close at all times. After he stepped back as bodyguard, he remained in his old rooms just for the sake of old habits. But if he was honest, he would admit to himself that he just liked to be close to Clarisse.

Clarisse probably was on her way to her office to start her day and had just passed his door when he and his date stumbled out of his rooms.

"Your majesty. I am very sorry, are you unharmed?" he asked.

Right at that moment he heard both women grasp. He guessed that his date like himself realised that they collided with the queen of Genovia, and she looked exited. Clarisse on the other hand was very good at concealing her emotions. She was difficult to read. But knowing her quite well, he guessed she was at least annoyed.

His date could not suppress her enthusiasm any longer and said:

"I am so sorry your majesty. But I hope you don't mind me saying that even considering the circumstances I find great pleasure in meeting you."

With that the woman held out her hand towards her queen.

Clarisse then did something that told Joseph that his estimation was wrong. She wasn't annoyed. She was downright angry.

Clarisse completely ignored his date. Which was not only arrogant and antisocial, but also very unlike Clarisse who always tried to keep up the best possible social standards. Especially with strangers.

She looked him in the eye and said in a cold way:

"First of all, it's very bad behaviour for adult people to stumble and play around the hallway. I think you can do better than this Joseph. And second, it's inappropriate to fiddle around in the hallway during your shift. Which, if I may remind you, stared five minutes ago."

Joseph felt ashamed and hurt after hearing those words and a gave the only reply that he thought would be in order at the moment.

"Yes, your majesty. It won't happen again."

After hearing Joseph's answer Clarisse finally acknowledged the other woman who meanwhile had lowered her outstretched arm and looked dumb folded at the scene.

"May I recommend that you close the top buttons of your blouse? You are a little bit too exposed I would say."

And with that the queen turned around towards the end of the hallway and was out of sight.

While Joseph still stared at the empty hallway his date started to talk hysterically.

"Oh my god, oh my god. I feel so cheap right now. I meet the queen of Genovia while my breasts are half exposed. No wonder she tried to ignore me…. I would have done the same probably."

Joseph shifted his gaze towards the lady and saw that she quickly started closing the blouse.

"Are you alight?" she asked him. "If you ask me, I think she was quite hard on you. For what it's worth to hear my opinion."

"Yes, yes. I am fine." Joseph replied. But that was a lie. He was far from all right. He was hurt and confused.

He saw her biting her lip again.

"I hope that I did not ruin your career." She said softly.

"Not I don't think so. I have been working her for a while. So, I won't be sent away over a small incident." He managed to say with a smile.

"I guess, we will take the short way to the door then."

"Yes. I think that is for the best."

When he had let the lady out of the palace, Joseph walked towards the security office without stopping at the kitchen to collect his usual morning coffee.

He sat down, picked up a pile of paper and stared at the words. Meanwhile he tried to process what just happened.

Clarisse was angry. And he understood that she did not fancy being knocked onto the ground. But it was an accident and she was not hurt. He collided with her before and back then she just laughed about it, said sorry and that was that.

For the fact that he brought a woman into his rooms. Well that was his own business wasn't it? But he had to admit that it was unprofessional that he was late for his shift because it took him so long to say goodbye to his one-night stand. But he was always early starting with work, working extra hours, never complaining. One day being fifteen minutes late was not that big of an issue was it?

And yes, those exposed breasts, that was stupid, he had to admit that. But why not laughing about it? Why being so damn cold. They were friends and he was angry and hurt that she had been angry and unreasonable with him.

But he also felt ashamed and sorry. Ashamed that he took a woman into his rooms to have a one-night stand with. Sorry that Clarisse had to see him that way. He was sorry somehow that he gave in onto his desires. He never wanted Clarisse to find out about his every now and then dates.

He sighted and tried to calm down and examine his own emotions.

Why was he so hurt by this whole thing?

He knew the answer.

Since they agreed to ignore their mutual spark, it had not been easy for him. When he stopped being her bodyguard, they had set a steady rhythm of meetings about security issues. But they turned more and more into meeting with friends' moments. They always seemed to find a moment to talk, walk in the garden, have lunch.

Clarisse was a great friend. The last years they even became better friends. The grief of Rupert's death wore off a little and Amelia learned fast and turned out to be a very sweet young woman. Clarisse became happier and more relaxed over the years.

Joseph watched it from close by. He valued their friendship a lot. But next to friendly and kind Clarisse was also a very attractive woman. How deeper their friendship became, how more frequent he felt a spark. First, he tried to pretend that they were not there. Later he started to look forward to them and enjoy those moments.

He was sure Clarisse noticed that he felt something. He could control his actions and not act on his feelings. God knew he wanted to kiss her, do a lot more than that. But he told himself no. But he could not control his emotions and the way they spread across his face. But she, in all those years, never said anything about it or showed anything herself.

He had to admit to himself that against all odds, he was completely in love with Clarisse. His queen. But he respected their agreement and besides he was far too afraid to lose his friendship with her if he tried something more.

Joseph tore his eyes away from his paperwork and walked over to the monitors. He quickly found the image he was looking for. The queen's office where Clarisse was working behind her desk. He stared at her for a few moments, then tore his gaze away.

Her outburst hurt him because he cared. He felt ashamed that Clarisse saw him with another woman because he did not really want it that way. He was hurt because he loved her. He wanted to be with her, not with a one-night stand date. He was angry with her because she was unreachable. He was angry with her because while he loved her, she still could hurt him so much.

Angry. Hurt.

Suddenly a possibility struck him.

He was angry because he was hurt.

Could it be, could it possibly be that she was angry because…because she was hurt as well?

Maybe, just maybe, when Clarisse saw him with another woman, she was hurt because she was jealous? While being hurt she covered that emotion with anger in order not to show it?

Clarisse was very good in hiding her emotions, even towards him.

Yes, it was a possibility. Yes, maybe she also felt the spark and tried to ignore it.

It was an absurd thought. But the small opening made Joseph smile.


	7. 7 After the stumbling hallway incident

Chapter 7. From Clarisse's POV. Her thoughts about the scene from the previous chapter. 

**7\. After the stumbling hallway incident**

When she finished her morning tea she decided to finally get up and get to work. She was five minutes late already. But of course being the queen had positive sides. A queen is never late, everyone else is simply early.

Leaving her suite she walked across the hallway when suddenly a door opened and someone stumbled into view. She tried to avoid a collision, but it went too fast to do something about it. The person bumped into her and she could not keep herself standing. Luckily, while heading to the ground she felt that a hand grabber her upper arm in order to steady her somewhat. It only helped a little because she still landed on her knees.

While she tried to get onto her feet again she suddenly realised who it was she collided with.

Joseph. Her head of security.

Although she had never been inside his rooms, she knew his were situated at the same corridor as hers. Somehow she felt safe knowing that he was close during the night also.

"Your majesty. I am very sorry, are you unharmed?" she heard Joseph say.

When she looked up and saw what situation they were in she grasped for air.

It turned out that Joseph was not alone. They had actually bumped into her together. The other person was a attractive woman.

She felt hurt and jealousy flow through her body. Joseph apparently was in a relationship? She wasn't aware of a woman in his life. But clearly there was someone and she clearly was not just a friend. She was sure about that because the upper buttons of the woman's blouse were open and the top of her bare breast was showing. She tried not to stare at it so she looked away towards Joseph. Trying to keep her expression neutral.

The woman that was apparently Joseph's partner started speaking:

"I am so sorry your majesty. But I hope you don't mind me saying that even considering the circumstances I find great pleasure in meeting you."

Clarisse saw from the corner of her eye that the woman held out her hand in order for her to shake it.

She did not know very well what to do. She was caught out of guard. She feared that she could not be kind to this woman in the current situation. She wanted to run and hide. She found herself surpassing tears that were building. But she managed to keep them away for now. She did not want to let the woman or especially Joseph know what she truly felt.

Early in her marriage with Rupert he learned her how you could keep true thoughts and emotions away from your face. The main rule to accomplish this is by focussing on the display of another emotion. Sometimes that could be a smile while in horrible company or a serene face while being in parliament during boring meetings. It took her years of practice, but she now was very good at showing one emotion while feeling something else.

But in this case she was not in control. She was far too hurt and confused to get the smile onto her face. So in a split second she decided to go for another emotion. Anger.

She had to do something to get in charge of the situation again and quickly. Before Joseph noticed what was going on.

So she kept ignoring the other woman and gave Joseph a stern look. Then she said in a very serious matter:

"First of all, it's very bad behaviour for adult people to stumble and play around the hallway. I think you can do better than this Joseph. And second, it's inappropriate to fiddle around in the hallway during your shift. Which, if I may remind you, started five minutes ago."

It felt like doing some justice when she saw Joseph's cheeks redden. Yes. Let him feel sorry for this she thought.

Joseph replied with: "Yes, your majesty. It won't happen again."

She couldn't look at Joseph any longer after this and finally turned her attention to Joseph's lover.

She had no intention at all to be properly introduced to the woman. She did not want to acknowledge her as Joseph's girlfriend and she felt a little unsure about the open blouse. But as with a lot of things in live it always seems best to address issues on the spot. So she dared to say to the lady:

"May I recommend that you close the top buttons of your blouse? You are a little bit too exposed I would say."

She could not hold herself together much longer. She had to get out of this situation and think it over. So while not looking at Joseph she quickly turned around and marched trough the hallway and around the corner.

After slipping into her private bathroom that adjoined her office she allowed herself to cry for a minute. Then she looked at herself in the mirror and said out loud "oh, stop it stupid woman."

It was her own fault that she felt this way. Jealousy was a despicable emotion anyway. Especially towards someone you had no claim on whatsoever.

With that thought she had to fight back tears again. She had no claim on Joseph.

Years ago after the kiss they shared it seemed best to focus on their friendship, rather than on something more.

For the last years for her that had been the best course to follow. Mourning took time and it had taken her years to really accept that Rupert was gone. That he was no longer a part of her daily life. While she grew further into her role as queen she was very happy to have Joseph as a friend.

He was not her bodyguard anymore. But he accompanied her to most of the bigger meetings and stood somewhere where he could be seen. With his presence showing everyone that the queen's security was tight and professional. In their private lifes they fell into a nice routine of walks in the garden or a nightcap every now and then.

Joseph quickly became good friends with Amelia and he kept his original promise to help her to develop a friendship with her granddaughter also.

For sure, while working together of spending time as friends she felt it sometimes. The spark was still there. Joseph felt them equally. She knew that for certain because he in contrast to her was not very good at keeping his emotions in check. But again he also kept this promise and never crossed the line of friendship again. She on her part never mentioned anything about his obvious feelings.

For years she was happy and content with their agreement on friendship. But the last months she noticed that she became more and more confused. While she could very easy ignore the spark in the past by keeping the friendship goal at the front of her mind, the last time that she felt a spark she had to surpass thoughts of the feeling of his lips on hers.

For a while now she had been debating with herself about her feelings. If she was in love or if it was just lust. Now she knew the answer. She was jealous for goodness sake! She wanted to be the woman that came out of Joseph's room in the morning. To snuggle into bed with him in the evening. Him to unfasten buttons of her blouse.

But he had been with that other woman tonight. She was the one he kissed, made love to and…

For the third time that day tears were coming. She held them back again. She was not going to cry over this.

Yes she clearly was in love. In love with Joseph.

While love should feel great, at this moment it only hurt. It was her own fault. If she was interested in Joseph she should have acted on it. She could barely expect from him to wait for her for years and years.

But what was she thinking anyway? Waiting for her? Why was she even thinking that! He was in a relationship right now. Probably because he felt something for his lady, not for his queen who just wanted to be friends.

God what a mess she was.

Oh, but even when Joseph was without a girlfriend, any romantic relation between the two of them would be difficult anyway. In her heart she knew that she would do everything to finish her job as queen in a good way. She owed that to Rupert. She promised him and she would not break that promise. Amelia needed her guidance now and after her coronation. So one way or another…even if Joseph was interested in a romantic relationship…it was unfair to ask him to wait or to hide in the shadows for her.

Suddenly she realised that she had been very rude. Both to Joseph himself and to the woman in his life. Joseph wanted to have a good relationship for years now. She knew that, she wished for him to be happy. If she could not be the woman in his life, then she should be happy for him and support him as a friend now that he found someone. If he would forgive her for her behaviour that was.

"What must he think of such an ill friend. Silly woman." She told herself.

I have to go and speak with him this evening she thought. Offer my apologies and this time shake hands with his lady. The idea that she could have damaged their friendship send chills across her arms.

She took a towel from the shelf and cleaned her face. "Now it's time to get to work your majesty" she told herself.

After she sat down in her office chair she did not manage to concentrate fully on her work. But she kept trying and she picked up a letter from the pile and opened it. She was unaware that at that very moment Joseph was looking at a live footage of her.


	8. 8 Joseph's room

Chapter 8. 

**8\. Joseph's rooms**

Joseph came out of the shower and took a towel from the shelf. The warm water had been kind to his tensed muscles. After drying himself he left the hot bathroom and walked towards his bedroom closet. While putting on a boxer short and a long pyjama trousers he checked the time. He saw that it was 10:29 already. He quickly turned on his bedroom TV in order to be in time to watch the 10:30 news bulletin. Being glad that he already changed the sheets he sat on the bed and moved over to the headboard in order to lean against it while watching.

At the exact moment that the newsreader started with the first item he heard a distant knock. He realised that there must be someone standing outside of his sitting room door. Probably one of the security guys from today's night shift with an issue or something. He moaned and grumbled to himself "can't they solve their own problems for once."

He was already halfway his sitting room when he realised that his chest was bare. He shouted towards the door "give me 30 seconds" and turned back to his bedroom where he grabbed a black t-shirt from a chair. He put it on while walking towards the door again.

At the other side of the door Clarisse anxiously waited. This morning a talk with Joseph and his girlfriend seemed the most logical and best option. But during the day she became more and more nervous about the conversation that lay ahead. It had been her plan to visit Joseph right after dinner. But she had postponed the moment. She had been ready for bed when she finally decided that she had to sort things out. So here she was, in her nightwear at Joseph's door.

Before leaving her suite, she opted for changing again. But she was stern for herself thinking, Clarisse, if you don't go now, you will probably never go. So, on you go! But now she whished that she had changed back into daily attire. She felt exposed even if her nightwear covered her well enough.

Before she could think about it any longer the door opened. Within a few seconds she saw Joseph's face turn from annoyed, to surprised, to worried.

"Dear god, Clarisse, is something wrong?" he asked.

"Oh well, I…yes there is something…" she tried to say but Joseph interrupted her.

"Is there an emergency situation or a threat that I need to address immediately?"

While looking at Joseph, Clarisse noticed that he was on high alert. He took a step in her direction in order to, so she learned over the years, protect her with his own body. Meanwhile quite harshly grabbing her upper arm and looking in both directions of the hallway to see if there was someone else in view.

"No! Joseph. I just wanted to talk." She told him. His grip on her arm was tight and he pulled her inside his room away from the hallway. "There is no immediate danger" she continued "I only want to…"

Again, Joseph left no room for her to finish her sentence and interfered "Are you absolutely sure of that?" Meanwhile letting his eyes wander over her body in order to check if she really was all right.

"Yes, yes of course I am sure of that." Her tone was not angry, she sounded overwhelmed.

Silence fell between them. Still standing close to each other next to the open door.

Joseph felt like a fool for the second time today. He completely overreacted. As if Clarisse would be in a line of gunfire or real danger in her own palace hall. But her visit was such a surprise for him that the first thing of he could think of was an emergency.

"Joseph" he heard Clarisse say after a while. "You are hurting me." Her gaze focused on his hand on her arm.

He quickly loosened his grip, but he did not let go completely. Not willing to lose the contact yet. Realising that she stood very close he consciously smelled her sweet perfume and he saw that she wore cream coloured evening wear. He became aware that he was in his nightwear also and on bare feet. But well, after all, this was his room wasn't it? And he was off duty now. So, he did not feel guilty.

Rather the opposite. They had never been so close to one another wearing anything else then formal attire. The nightgown was decent enough, but still Joseph felt the familiar feeling rising.

"You wanted to see me?" he asked in order to bend his mind to another subject.

"Yes. I wanted to visit earlier, but I was delayed and…" Maybe Clarisse had more words on the tip of her tongue. But she was silenced by the spark that splashed when she looked up and their eyes met.

This time Joseph did not concentrate on himself or on attempts to conceal his feelings as he had done the last years when he felt this way. Instead he looked intently at the woman that stood so close to him. Did she feel that? He thought that he saw something in her eyes. The same thing he saw this morning. That gave some hope in the right direction.

But what he did know for sure was that for him this was it. This feeling was far better than how he felt his morning. This morning when he woke up next to his one-night-stand. This very morning when he had sex with a woman that was not Clarisse. He could not wrap his head around things. Why on earth did he bring a one-night-stand into his rooms? What did he gain with that? How could he ever explain this or make this up with Clarisse?

Even with these disturbing feelings in his head, Joseph savoured this moment of closeness. He could feel her body heat radiate through their clothes. It felt like a loss when Clarisse took a step back.

"Shall we close the door and sit down." Clarisse said and she looked away towards the sofa. "That is if it suits you."

Clarisse felt confused. She was determined to support Joseph in his relationship. But there it was again. The spark. While looking at Joseph she knew that he felt it too. Was it lust for him then? Considering that there was another woman in his life.

Walking over to the sofa in order to sit down she saw a flashing TV light. It was shining through a slightly open door behind which she supposed was Joseph's bedroom. Wondering if Joseph's girlfriend was behind that door, she decided to get on with it quickly.

She waited for Joseph to sit down at the other side of the sofa and said "I actually came to see you in order to apologise for my behaviour this morning. I was exaggerating and unpolite."

Joseph surprisingly smiled shyly at her and replied "There is no need for an apology. Actually, I am quite ashamed about myself and the whole situation."

So far so good she thought. Now came the harder part.

"I want to extend my apology towards your girlfriend."

Joseph gave her a questioning look, so she continued.

"Maybe you can introduce me to her properly. What is her name anyway?"

Joseph looked somewhat uncomfortable by now. He nervously coughed and reluctantly said in a low voice "I…don't…have a girlfriend."

Clarisse did not understand his remark immediately. So, she went on "Well, what do you call the lady that I saw this morning then?"

Joseph knew he had to confess. That he had to go trough this. "I…she…I met her in a bar."

Clarisse still did not get what he was saying.

"She and I, we…we…we just shared the night." He hated himself for the stuttering.

Clarisse stoop up from the sofa as if it was on fire. "What! You picked her up for one night of sex! Is that what you are trying to say?"

Joseph quickly stood also. "Listen Clarisse please."

He grabbed her hands in his, but Clarisse did not look at him.

But even the queen of Genovia was not that good that she could hide the emotions from her face that exploded inside her at this moment. Joseph looked at her face and saw disgust but also something else. Relief, maybe even some sort of satisfaction. Holding his hopes high he decided it was now or never.

"I know that it is a bit…disgusting. I already don't understand anymore why I invited her here."

He stroked the back of Clarisse her hands. She did not pull back and he took that as a sign to continue.

"But I already promised this morning that it won't happen again. And I fully intent to keep that promise. I will not bring random woman into my rooms again."

Clarisse still looked to the rug on the floor. He took a deep breath before he dared to say his next sentence.

"But I will break another promise that I once made."

Finally, Clarisse looked up to him. Her face again shielded and difficult to read. "What promise do you relate to?"

"I don't want to stick to being just friends any longer." It came out louder than he intended.

"Oh…you can't be serious Joseph. You lay down with _her_ half a day ago!" She replied equally loud.

"Then tell me that you were not jealous this morning." He knew it was somehow mean to play this trick on her. But if it worked, then it was worth it.

A silence fell, Clarisse pulled her hands away and sat down on the sofa again. She was slightly blushing.

"I don't mind if you were. Actually, I am happy that you finally showed something to me." Joseph continued while he kept standing.

Clarisse sighted and confessed "I felt so stupid this morning being jealous. It's my own fault that I kept you at arm's length all the time."

"No Clarisse" Joseph responded "we decided together if I remember correctly that being friends was for the best. We were both just too stubborn to open the discussion again."

Joseph considered that it was safe again to sit down next to Clarisse, which he did, but he kept a decent distance.

"Joseph" Clarisse said while sliding closer and cupping his cheek "I expect you to woo me properly."

Joseph chuckled at this direct request. At least now that it was in the open between them, she knew what she wanted. "Your whish is my command."

"But take your time. I will need a few weeks in order to forget this picture in my head where I see you kissing some other woman." A small smile as well as a frown crept across her face while saying the words.

For both it was unclear if this was a tease with a serious hint, or a grave remark with a funny side to it.

Suddenly Clarisse stood and said "I need to go to bed. Full day tomorrow."

"Goodnight Joseph. Thank you for letting me in."

"Thank you for coming. Sweet dreams."

Clarisse left and Joseph was alone in his sitting room again. Completely confused and content at the same time.


	9. 9 Sweet dreams

Chapter 9.

Getting more towards de adult material now.

**9\. Sweet dreams**

_A few weeks later. _

Joseph was half asleep half awake. This early in the morning his room was still dark, and he lay down on his back on the soft mattress. He just woke up somewhat from a dream in which he was alone with Clarisse. She said into his ear "I expect you to woo me properly." He replied with "Your whish is my command." In his dream he pulled her towards him and kissed her, then took of her clothes and stoked her bare breasts. She was sweet, willing and ready. The pictures were blurry in his head, but it still turned him on. Sleepy he let his hand wander inside his boxer short. He found his hard member and stroked it. One, twice until he found a well know rhythm. His breath became a little laboured. Keeping his eyes shut he focussed on Clarisse's face. Wondering what it would look like while experiencing pleasure.

Suddenly her face turned angry and his dream Clarisse said, "You picked her up for one night of sex!".

Joseph's mood changed immediately.

Still panting he jumped out of bed. A move he regretted when he felt the effect that had on his knees. He ignored the pain and stumbled towards the bathroom. He took off his boxer short and tossed it away. He turned on the shower and twisted the temperature knob to the left. Cold water ran over his body. It was so cold that his body could not stand it and he stepped back from the spray against the tiled shower wall.

The short contact with the cold water woke him up completely. Still shivering he was able to think strait again. He arousal was gone.

This was not the first time the last weeks he had a dream about Clarisse. They always started sweet and sensual and every time he tried to find a way to relief his building desire. Then suddenly his sweet dream turned into a nightmare when Clarisse reminded him of his sexual escapades…

The last weeks since Clarisse visited him in his room were confusing. After years of holding back and not acting on his feelings, they took a sudden turn. Without really discussing how, what, when, and so on. She asked him to woo her, and he agreed. He had to keep that promise, but how?

He did not want to ruin their friendship. He still felt guilty about the incident with his one-night-stand. And then he supposed that she wanted to keep things under the radar and there still was her duty to Genovia and towards the princess.

He knew how to get intimate with a woman. He wanted to kiss Clarisse, stroke her everywhere, fall into bed together. But this was Clarisse, a royal. You don't invite a queen strait into your bed in order to start something more then a friendship. She told him to go slow and wait a little. He understood and respected that. But… it was not easy.

Every time he was alone with Clarisse he wanted to act. But every time he felt afraid that maybe it was too much or well… He did not really know. He was just nervous about the possibility that it could go wrong. He knew that he should start with small gestures. But when to start with that?

Acting too quick was wrong but doing nothing was not the right also.

He turned the shower off and while drying himself his knees pained him. The cold water didn't do any good. "I am getting old" he muttered to himself. "Before you know it, you are death in your grave."

Dead. Time was ticking away. I must get going with this Joseph realised. Before it's too late. We've already wasted so much time. Whatever the outcome will be. When I don't try, I am sure it won't work.

He was able to set his nerves aside. He dropped the towel and quickly dressed. It was still early in the morning when he walked through the flower garden. He picked some pink and white roses and rushed towards the queen's office which as he expected was still empty at this hour.

While walking towards the desk he realised that he forgot to bring a vase. But he saw the pencil box and emptied it. He opened a drawer and threw the pens inside. Then he went to the bathroom and poured some water. Back at the desk he looked at the result. The bouquet looking quite nice.

Yes, this would be a good start.

When Clarisse came into her office her eye fell on the small bouquet of roses that was on her desk. The fact that it was there and that her pencil box was used as vase made her smile.

Finally, she thought.

Since their confession in Joseph's room a few weeks ago she and Joseph were going…well…nowhere.

He promised to woo her. Which was an exiting prospect. Scary and confusing, but also very exciting. She had no experience being romanced. Her marriage with Rupert was arranged by their parents. They had been friendly with each other from the start. But there was no need from both sides to persuade the other into a relationship. That was determined already. The focus had been on becoming friends and getting to know each other.

Clarisse wanted to keep things in the shadows. Amelia was graduating and coming home within a month now. Another few months and she would be crowned. So busy and stressful months were coming up. After that the new queen would still need daily support from her grandmother. And to sum that all up that meant that a little scandal in the news about the queen's new lover was not what Genovia needed right now.

Still a little shocked about Joseph's sex life she told Joseph to go slow. She said that to him not because she did not want to be a little intimate. But because she did not want to sleep with him at the first night. Thinking about his one-night-stand she expected the first step to come from him, making up somehow. She expected him to understand. Clearly, he understood her wrong.

There had not been a sign of anything since their talk. Thinking that Joseph was afraid to overstep his boundaries Clarisse had decided this morning to take things in her own hands and to take initiative herself. She was still thinking about a way to surprise him, but now she had found the roses. It made her happy, she did not even mind that the flowers came from her own garden.

Smelling one of the pink roses she noted that there was no card or any other sign that this was Joseph's work. But she knew it had to be. She wondered where her pens had gone, and she opened the top drawer of her desk. She laughed to herself when she saw the messy heap of pens inside.

It was lunchtime when Joseph knocked at the door and after her "come in" stepped into the queen's office. He carefully closed the door again, he wanted this conversation to be private.

He smiled when he saw Clarisse concentrated at work next to his improvised vase with roses. After signing a document, she looked up and smiled when she realised it was him.

"It's lunch time I suppose?" she asked while she stood up.

"Yes, it is. I have been told that lunch indeed is ready for you."

Joseph watched while Clarisse walked over to him until she faced him and stood quite close. He held his breath, he was a little nervous about her reaction to the bouquet.

"The roses are lovely" she said, and she stroked his face with her right hand while placing a light kiss on his left cheek.

Joseph sighted happily and enjoyed the feeling of her hand and her lips. He did not expect her to be so forward with her thank you. He let his hands caress her upper arms. This turned out quite well. He really liked her, and he decided to tell her, "Clarisse, I like you a lot."

She didn't move away from their close stance and replied, "I already knew that, didn't I?"

"I guess so, but I hope that you don't mind me saying it every now and then?"

She gave him that sweet smile again and replied, "No I don't mind too much." A broader smile. "Walk me to lunch?"

"Yes, sure." Joseph reluctantly leaved their embrace and turned away to open the door for her, when he heard her say.

"Join me this evening after work?"

He turned back a little surprised and glad at the same time, "Are you sure? I don't want compromise you."

"Yes, but Joseph… I don't mean to…" she did not finish whatever she wanted to say.

He reached for her hand and kissed the back of it. "I believe I understand Clarisse. I won't try anything if that idea worries you."

She looked at him again, smiling. "It's not that I don't want to…well…how to put it…I just want to say that there is a middle between nothing and everything."

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Which startled both and they quickly stepped apart.

"One minute" Clarisse said towards the door.

She continued in a low voice "see you tonight then?"

Joseph nodded.


	10. 10 Evening drinks

Chapter 10.

Thanks for the reviews. Helps me motivated to continue this.

**10\. Evening drinks**

"Do you prefer white or red?" she asked while facing the table with a wide range of choice for drinks. Joseph was here for a minute or two now and she offered to pour some whine. Having a maid around was not what she liked in her own rooms all the time, and especially this evening with Joseph she preferred privacy. Arranging the drinks also was a perfect excuse to create some distance. When she got no reply she turned around, gave him a questioning look and asked "Joseph? White or red?"

"Oh…excuse me…white maybe? I would like to have something cold" Joseph answered while he sat himself down at the sofa at what usually was her own favourite spot. His right-hand stroking one of the cushions. He looked a little distracted and so very calm with the whole situation.

She noticed that he wore the same as he did at lunchtime, a black attire with white shirt. But he had taken the jacket off and probably left it somewhere in his own rooms. He looked smart, very smart dressed like this. She felt a blush spreading her face. _Stop it Clarisse!_ She reprimanded herself quietly inside her head. _You act like a teenage girl on her first date!_ _What must he think!_ Reaching for a chilled bottle of white whine she tried to suppress her rising nervousness.

When she wanted to grab the opener, she realized that it wasn't in its usual place. Searching for it her mind rambled on. _We've had this comfortable friendship for years. There is no need to be nervous, the both of us have this under control. _

There it was, apparently it had fallen to the ground. She bent and grabbed the opener. _God, he is very attractive, isn't he?_ She looked over her shoulder to find him starting at her. Quickly she focussed on her task at hand while reprimanding herself again. _You are the queen for heaven's sake. He's always lovely, it's going to be great. _

In the meantime, she tried to pull the cork out of the bottle. A first attempt, a second a third. But the cork would not give way. During a small pause in which she gathered energy for another try a warm hand covered hers.

"Let me assist" Joseph softly said next to her ear. He had approached her without her noticing. Her nervousness even rose a little more, but she nodded in response. Joseph stood close, his stomach resting against her back. His arm circling her with his right hand covering the hand that she held the opener in. His left hand helped her left hand to hold the bottle of wine in place.

She felt that he started to pull, and she moved along with him. Finally, the cork gave way and the bottle opened with a soft plop. "Thank you" she said with a treble in her voice.

"Sweetheart look at me?" his tone caring.

While honouring his request she couldn't keep herself from smiling and thinking _he called me sweetheart…_ With the opener still in her hand she turned and looked Joseph in the eye.

Up close she realised that he was Joseph, just the same as he was yesterday, then why was she holding back? Then he said, "Don't think that I am not nervous about this."

"You really are?"

"Of course, I am. I doesn't happen every day that I get the change to spend time with you the way I want to." His voice was a little hoarse. "Holding you close like this," he pulled her close and moved his hands around her lower back. "is a good start."

Standing close indeed was a good start. Feeling the warmth, soft material of clothes pressed together… "Well, I am equally nervous I guess." She replied honesty.

Joseph took the opener plus cork from her hand and placed it on the table. "Yes, I know. It makes you even more attractive."

Her attraction to Joseph won over her nerves. So, she leaned forward and stroked his lips with hers. A soft touch at first. But he responded eagerly so she put more pressure in the kiss and covered his lips with hers completely. She heard him moan into her mouth. He broke the kiss, stroked her hair out of her face and whispered her name "Clarisse".

Joseph heard himself whisper her name "Clarisse".

She rested her head against his shoulder, face into his neck. For a while they just stood like that in a tight embrace.

She was so lovely tonight. The rumbling with the opener to hide her nerves was very endearing. After this first kiss, he felt his own body relax and het noticed that Clarisse was relaxing in his arms also.

He tilted her head and kissed her again, light on the corner of her mouth. "I find myself" another kiss at the other corner "completely" a kiss on her cheek "head over heels" a kiss on her left ear "in love with you" he whispered.

He felt her shudder in his arms and she kissed him on his mouth, a deep kiss, more demanding with more desire building. He felt his own desire rising in his lower body. God this was…why did they postpone their feelings for so damn long. Kiss her was good and she really opened to him now, asking for more.

"If feel like a teenager in love with the most popular boy from school" she giggled in between kisses that became better and hotter with every passing kiss.

"Hardly. I am not the most popular amongst staff I can assure you" he replied equally chuckling. "But we are two people in love then."

"Yes, I believe we are." With the clear confession about their feelings the air cleared even more.

Joseph decided to finally give some attention to the wine. He found two glasses and poured the wine. Handing one glass to Clarisse they both tried it.

"The wine is good, but not as good as you" he said after another sip. He bowed forward and kissed her again. He used his tongue to gain entrance and he tasted the still cold wine. They stopped when they were in need for air.

"You can't say that to a lady" she reprimanded him. She pretended not to like his comment and actions, but she still laughed. "Are you flirting with me?" She untangled herself from him and sat down on the sofa.

Joseph joined her and said, "I definitely believe I am, hoping that I can kiss you again." And they did so, glasses of wine disregarded on a nearby table.

Within a few minutes they were exploring each other with kisses. Clarisse let her kisses wander all over Joseph's face. She found his earlobe and took it into her mouth.

"Clarisse" he turned his head away "I don't really like that." His voice harsher than he meant to.

"Oh, I…I am sorry." She withdrew a little and suddenly looked insecure. "Did I ruin the mood now?"

Joseph stroked her face and her lips with his thumb. He shook his head in order to answer no. "It's good to learn what the other finds nice, it's an exploring game."

He continued whispering. "For instance, I found out today that you like to be kissed at the spot just below your ear." His actions matching his words kissing her lightly at the soft spot just mentioned.

Clarisse moaned a little and said, "How did you know?"

"By your reaction. Every time my kisses wandered around there you sighted. So, I made a mental note to kiss you there again because you like to be kissed there."

Leaning into the backseat of the sofa and into each other Clarisse let her hands wander over his shoulders. "Where do you like to be kissed most?"

Joseph pushed Clarisse back into the sofa gently and covered her upper body with his. Stroking trough her hear and holding her head with two hands he whispered to her lips "I like to be kissed full on the mouth, a deep kiss where our tongues taste and find each other."

Clarisse offered her lips order to allow him such a kiss, but Joseph said, "Tell me if I do anything that you don't like?" She nodded and then they started kissing again.

But Joseph felt insecure and broke the kiss again "Really Clarisse, I don't hold back normally while…uhm…I don't want to…well you know…I mean, please tell me, what do you want?"

The complete answer was a long an complicated story and they both knew they had to work it out together. What was their relationship exactly? For a moment Clarisse doubted if she wanted to address how to move forward after tonight. But she dreaded that conversation, so she made up her mind.

"For tonight sitting on the sofa with you, talking and sharing kisses is all I need." She placed a kiss on his forehead and after that they spent the rest of the evening practicing and learning their favourite kisses.


	11. 11 Before Joseph's trip to America

Chapter 11.

Not much happens in this chapter. Due to the last full days at work before Christmas break I have less time and inspiration. I'm sorry, I will try and get inspired over Christmas.

**11\. Before Joseph's trip to America**

A few weeks later.

Joseph sat on the sofa in Clarisse's suite again. Ever since that first date night they continued to spend some dates together. Not every evening, just one or twice a week. They had obligations elsewhere and they just started dating anyway. Getting to know each other slowly went well.

Until now they settled for Clarisse's suite as location every time. It was safe ground, no one dared to enter the Queen's private domain without asking permission to enter and there were no cameras. During their dates they talked about everything and nothing, they shared kisses and held hands.

Joseph was content with how things were progressing. Clarisse was getting more and more comfortable during their evenings together and less nervous. He himself was struggling to keep things slow at the intimate level, but he managed great until now. Keeping everything low profile, don't overdo things, don't ruin anything. But his dreams, well…

He watched as Clarisse opened a bottle of wine again like she did every time he met her in her suite. She got the cork out at the first attempt today. It was a nice sight, but still Joseph was concerned a little. Tomorrow he would leave for America. The princess just finished her education and he would be present at the celebration ceremony and then escort her home. Clarisse was not able to attend due to parliament meetings in Genovia, so they would be separated for a week.

He could stand that separation, but he was a little nervous about how to continue once the princess was around non-stop. She would bark into any room Clarisse was in at any time without asking. She was family after all and Clarisse would pay a lot of attention to her granddaughter. So, what would become of them?

The arrival of the princess also meant that Clarisse would not be Queen much longer. A few months and then she would step down to make room for the princess. She would still be the new Queen's main advisor, but it offered perspective for something else. Something more personal. A new relationship. Until now they had avoided the subject of a serious relationship and the future that was further away then just a few weeks.

Maybe there would be a chance for them to date somewhere else. Out. Going to the theatre or have dinner in town. Show their love to the world. Joseph smiled at the idea. But then he reminded himself harshly _what are you thinking! No ring, no bring!_ He looked away from Clarisse to his folded hands and sighted. It was everything or nothing. You can't have a relationship with royalty without being married. But how on earth could he ever court her properly if he had to do it in secret?

He sighted again. A difficult conversation was probably coming up. Not exactly what he wanted when the alternative was kissing Clarisse the whole evening.

"What's on your mind? Something troubling you?" she asked. When looking up he saw her walking towards him and handing him his glass.

"I think I want to discuss something" he murmured between sips.

Clarisse sat down and faced him, a little nervous. "Is it the lack of progress on our level of intimacy that is bordering you? I…well…I don't mind moving on a little." While talking she took his free hand and turned it, letting it rest palm down on the swell of her breast.

Joseph looked as his hand that rested on her chest, feeling the fabric of her blouse while holding his fingers still. Her train of thought was so different from his that he was dumb folded for a few seconds. He did not want to ruin this special moment, so he decided to address the serious subject about their relationship and their future later.

"I was just thinking about the events from today. But I have to admit that I long to touch you here."

While he kissed her, lips meeting, he tried to get rid of his glass somehow, trying not to spill any wine. When he succeeded both hands were free to stroke her breasts trough the fabric of her clothes. Her breast felt heavy, soft and warm. Clarisse moaned into his mouth when he found her nipples and stroked them with his thump.

His hands were pushed away and when he broke the kiss to check with her if he overstepped his boundaries, he saw her unbutton her blouse. His mind raced to a similar scenario with his one-night stand weeks ago, but he did not want to remind Clarisse of that right now and this was far better anyway. She responded to his touches so nicely, so warm, and apparently she wanted more.

A black lace bra came in sight and her nipples were hard now, showing trough the thin fabric. Not able to resist the temptation any longer Joseph brought his head down and kissed the swell of her left breast, then her right. Stroked the bottom of her breasts with his thumb while placing his mouth on the fabric, sucking on one of her nipples while her bra was still on.

His heartbeat went up fast, and he heard that Clarisse was breathing in and out quickly. It told him she liked this as much as he did. He let one of his hands travel around her body to her back, searching for the clasp of her bra when she stopped him. Her hand on his arm gently squeezing it.

"We have to stop."

While looking her in the eye and taking his hands away from her she continued "I know that I initiated this. It makes me feel…you know…but I am afraid that I won't be able to stop when we continue this. I don't want to go all the way yet."

She sighted and started to close her buttons.

"I am sorry." She stood, picked up her glass from the table and swallowed a big amount of wine.

"Don't be. We will get there together some day." Joseph said while he came to stand next to her and pulled her close.

While she rested her head against his shoulder he knew for sure. There is only one way to move forward. Marriage. My god, how to discuss that with her? He swallowed. But he also felt happy and smiled into her hair.


	12. 12 After the proposal

Chapter 12.

I decided to skip some weeks again and move on towards the proposal scene. Or somewhat afterwards.

**12\. After the proposal**

He watched the back of her head while she walked in front of him towards her next appointment. He found himself accompanying her most of the time now. Not as her bodyguard, but as a source of emotional support. He offered to do it and Clarisse accepted gratefully. They had an official story towards the staff, but they both new that it was an agreement about love and trust.

Joseph hadn't dared to address to subject of their relationship and its future since that evening before he travelled to America. Ever since he came back home the pressure on Clarisse and her duty seemed higher then ever before. At first the princess came in happily, but soon after her arrival there was the crazy viscount and his abnormal request. An arranged marriage.

It was a choice and many arranged marriages turned out to be good and happy ones. But one month was very short and the princess still very young. How many people get married aged 21 nowadays? Not so many. Clarisse tried to do as much herself as possible in order to take some burden off her granddaughter's shoulders.

Joseph on his turn supported Clarisse by listening and cuddling with her at the late evenings. Most of the time stealing some kisses. Well, stealing… It was Clarisse who started to heat things up last evening. Before she stopped them as always, keeping things proper. He felt like he was in his early twenties again, crazy in love. Thinking that this was the woman that he wanted to make his wife.

Marriage. Joseph wanted to marry Clarisse. Not today or tomorrow or not even this year. But you do not date a royal. That idea came back to him again and again. If you are serious you must take matters seriously and propose. It's either that or nothing. And if he had to pick between marriage or no official relationship at all, he would go for option one for sure.

But they had been only dating for a few weeks. He had the feeling that proposing now was a bad idea. It was too soon, and Clarisse focussed her attention on the crown these days. But he also had the feeling that not proposing also was a bad idea. Clarisse needed his support, he wanted to tell her that he was serious that she could rely on him.

In the meantime, Clarisse arrived at her office. The prime minister was waiting inside for a private audience. So, when the doors closed behind his love Joseph took a stance next to the guard that was already posted near the door. He smiled to himself.

His love. He proposed to her today. Just a mere five minutes ago. He asked her in a special way. He asked her to take their friendship out of the shadows. It was the perfect sentence to ask her with. He practiced it for weeks. It meant that he was serious about his relationship with her and at the same time he gave them room to develop their friendship further into a romantic relationship before becoming husband and wife.

He knew by her reaction that he surprised her. But by the way she kissed hem last night he knew that she loved him as much as he loved her. Clarisse was a smart woman, she would understand.

Not one second did he consider that maybe his way of thought was too difficult to grasp.

Clarisse heard the doors close behind her as she walked towards the prime minster. After receiving the kiss on her hand, she sat down and gestured the minister to do the same.

They had their weekly private audience together. Normally very interesting, but not today. While trying to listen to the conversation enough in order to nod or say "yes" or "no" at the appropriate moment, he thoughts were somewhere else.

Joseph just proposed to her? Did he? Was that actually what he asked? He did not use the words marriage, wife or whatever…but he said something about not kneeling, so yes…that must mean...

She was completely confused. Joseph supported her brilliantly the last weeks. He let her talk about her frustrations freely. He knew about her duty, told her he understood most of it. And oh god his kisses made her wish for more. She knew she had completely fallen for him.

It was not that she did not want to marry him. She did. She knew that it would be nearly impossible to date out in the open. Let alone bring Joseph to official meetings or parties. She was serious in her relationship and she knew that for Joseph it was just the same.

But why now! Why choose today or even this week for this half-hearted proposal? Why not waiting a few more weeks with this? They had been dating only for a few weeks for heaven's sake. Within three weeks Amelia would be married and crowned. For sure he had the patience for three more weeks!

And what does bring their friendship out of the shadows mean? Why was there no ring, no romantic dinner, no kisses, no declaration of love, no whatever romantic? Compared to their private evenings his proposal was very bleak and so very unlike Joseph.

She heard the prime minister cough in order to get her attention. She came up with an excuse "I'm sorry minister, I think my mind was elsewhere for a moment, please continue."

But a few seconds later she drifted off again. How to answer to this? Back at the gazebo the surprise and confusion were complete. She stumbled over her words and he told her to think about it for a while. That she would do for sure. Think about this strange proposal…

Probably if she would just leave it be until after the coronation there would be enough time to talk this trough. To ask him why, how and…. well…maybe to set a date in the future where they could get engaged maybe? She smiled to herself.

The prime minster asked her if she was all right….


	13. 13 After the table setting selection

Chapter 13.

Skipping towards right after the 'have you been thinking about us' scene. I did not get up with anything useful to write about the time in between the proposal and this moment. I'd rather spend time on what's coming next.

**13\. After the table selection**

Clarisse stood in the ballroom trying to hold back tears not very successfully. One drop escaped from her eye and fell on the table. Joseph had asked her if she had been thinking about them. They were dancing so nicely and a few seconds later everything blew apart.

She had been thinking about Joseph a lot since his strange proposal. She wanted to tell him that they had to wait for a few months, but that yes, she wanted him as husband. She had been afraid that waiting was not on his schedule. And apparently, based on his reaction from a few minutes ago, he found her not worth it to wait.

Of course, she had to finish her duty first and then she would be free to date a little more and then marry him. For sure he understood that? She sighted and let her hand wander over one of the plates. The same hand that lay on his cheek a few minutes ago.

It felt like there was a crack in her heart. He did not even allow her to finish whatever she had to say. He just walked away from her and called her his queen instead of Clarisse. His suggestion that she wanted him to see her foremost as his queen was just not true.

Where did this come from? He called her Clarisse for years now. They were friends for years. They shared kissed and talked a lot lately. It had to be clear for him that she wanted him to see her as a woman. She told him she was in love with him!

Stupid silly man. If he was going to act this way, he would not be worth it to marry her anyway. She was not going to give in and run after him. Clarisse felt her sorrow change into anger and irritation.

Her fist idea had been to go to him this evening to make up and talk things trough. A small fight between friends or lovers happened every now and then. It was no reason for a complete breakup. But no way she was going to take the first step. This was his mistake, not hers. She could be stubborn if necessary.

Clarisse quickly wiped her tears away with her fingers and set herself to work. Her frustration helping her to carry on with the tasks at hand.

Joseph sat in his rooms and waited and waited until it was far after midnight. She would not come. She would not visit him and apologise. She would not hurry into his arms and kiss him, offer to talk about it.

He swore to himself. He could have known. She probably already knew that she would not marry him anyway. Just enjoying his attentions for the time being. At least she was decent enough not to share her bed with him. Not playing with him in that way.

Another disappointment in life. He knew what he had to do. He had always done it this way after breakups, and it served him well until now. So, he knew he would do it again. A clean breakup would be best.

He poured himself a glass of whiskey and drowned it. Then a second glass. Coughing after swallowing the sharp liquid. He had to be at least a little drunk in order to do this. To write his letter of resignation and deliver it to her office.

If he stayed sober, he would not be able to push through. He loved her too much. But he had to do it. If he did not leave, he would stay. Seeing her every day, knowing that she did not love him enough. Suffering from his own love for her.

While he sat behind his computer typing the dreaded letter, he drank a third glass. It was a short letter, clear, with as little text as possible. He pressed the print button, took the piece of paper and signed it. He saved himself the trouble of grabbing an envelope. He would deliver it plain as it was.

He left his room and walked towards her office as quickly as he could in his slightly drunken condition. At this time of the night this part of the palace was nearly empty. The guards that he did pass did not ask him where he was going and why. One of the benefits being the boss.

He rushed into her office and towards her desk where he placed the letter in full sight. He knew that she would come here first thing in the morning after her breakfast. She would notice it and read it for sure. While brushing against her chair he saw one of her scarfs on the seat. Picking it up he held the scarf against his face, and he breathed in her scent.

He realised that he would never hold her again or be close enough to be able to feel her skin again. The effects of the alcohol where working on his body and he was getting emotional. He could not say goodbye to her scent yet. He had to take the scarf. She owned so many scarfs that she probably wouldn't miss this particularly one.

He stuffed the scarf into his pocket and walked back in order to leave but paused at the door. He looked into the dark room where he could just distinguish the white piece of paper on the surface of the desk. He was tempted to run back and grab it. But it would do no good.

He left and walked back to his own rooms slamming the door shut behind him. He tried to get himself a fourth glass of whisky but the was only a gulp left. Swallowing the last bit he threw the empty bottle into a corner. It did not shatter and that made him even angrier.

With nothing left to do he walked towards the bed and sat down on the edge. While he started to cry he took the scarf from his pocket and pressed it to his face again. Sobbing into it he sank into his pillow.

In-between sobs he said to himself and the empty toom, "Why did you refuse me? I love you so much. It….it hurts so much."

The sound of his phone ringing woke Joseph the next morning. His head was suffering from the alcohol while he sat up and pressed the answer button. It was one of his men asking where he was. He quickly looked at his watch which was still on his wrist. Ten in the morning. Shit.

Stumbling an apology he ended the conversation. He found himself still in bed, clothed in yesterdays attire and having a hangover. He slowly realised the events of yesterday.

He moaned and dropped back to bed.

What a stupid fool he was. He was still upset about her answer and actions from yesterday. He still longed for her to say yes. But why on earth did he act so rashly? They were friends for years. His timing was stupid. He could have talked to her about it later.

But instead he made a bigger mess of the whole situation. She would have read his letter by now. So he could not grab it back, undo things. But he still could try and do some damage control. He loved her, he knew that she loved him at least till some extend. There must be a way somehow.

Despite his headache he spurred himself into action. Washing his face, putting on a clean shirt and trousers. Finding painkillers and swallowing them with some water. But when he was about to rush out of his rooms in order to talk to her, he stopped himself.

"No Joseph" he whispered. "This is what you always do wrong."

This was where it always went wrong with him and his romantic relationships. By nature, he was calm and friendly. When he fell in love it always started nicely. But when love fully claimed him, he turned into a lunatic. His rushed actions driven by love driving away his loved one.

Today was the day before the royal wedding of princess Amelia. So that meant that Clarisse had something else to think about and work on now. He had to wait till the day after the wedding to talk with her.

He walked trough the corridor towards one of the balcony's from where he could oversee the garden. He knew that according to her schedule Clarisse would probably be there. He turned out to be right, she was outside with her dog.

While looking down at her he fiercely hoped that he could mend things with her.

Meanwhile Clarisse walked trough the garden. She had to work on the last details regarding the wedding, but again her mind was occupied elsewhere.

He actually resigned. Did she hurt him that much with her answer? Why did he not give them a change to talk about it? She was sorry for being so stubborn yesterday. She wished that…..oh….it was no use….

She was not panicking, rather some sort of grief started to consume her. She realised that she loves him more than she knew. She remembered him saying that he always ends his romantic relations with a clear cut. Now that she finally found true love, she was afraid that she already lost it before it even really stared.


	14. 14 After the royal wedding

Chapter 14.

Skipping to the wedding or actually the scene right afterwards.

**14\. After the royal wedding**

Holding hands Clarisse and Joseph walked into the small office adjoining the main entrance hall of the church. The room was usually used to give newlywed couples a few minutes alone before the day would continue with handshaking and talking to friends and family. The same use of the room was applied today, but rarely it was used for such a special couple.

When the door closed behind them, they let go of one another's hand and faced each other. Both quite confused from the rushed actions from minutes ago. Both happy for being married and also still a bit angry at the other for past week's events. Nerves for dreading the other's reaction running through their body's and filling the room.

They stood arm's length apart, Clarisse staring at her clasped hands fiddling with a piece of fabric on her dress. Joseph had his hand loosely in his pockets while he watched her face closely.

He wanted to close the distance between them, hold her, kiss her if she would allow him. But he feared that all of this was a mistake somehow. Why on earth did she refuse him a few days ago and marry him at an on the spot service today? He had to know that first before he would give in to his happy feelings. So, he spoke.

"Clarisse, what...why did you do that?"

She sighted and looked up at him. "Have I acted the wrong way? Was this not what you wanted?" Her voice sounding sad and tired. She sat down on the nearest chair her hands covering her face.

"No, no Clarisse. I am happy, very happy. This is what I wanted."

"Really?" She asked in order for reassurance, looking up from her hands.

With his voice full of emotion, he replied "Yes, I love you."

She outstretched her hand towards him and he took it. She abandoned the chair and leaned against his torso. "I love you a great deal as well."

Clarisse tilted her head and brushed her lips against Joseph's. Then kissing him sweet and softly. No desire, just love. Breaking the kiss Joseph addressed his question again, a bit clearer now.

"Why did you ask me to marry you today when just a few days ago you told me no?"

She sighted into his chest. "I did not want to tell you no Joseph. I wanted to tell you yes, but just not yet."

He looked at her thunderstruck.

"I just could not find the right words and you did not want to wait, or did not have to patience to listen." Clarisse let her fingers wander over the collar of his shirt.

Still very surprised he answered "No, no, that is not true." Stroking her arms, he continued. "My proposal was meant to reassure you that I am serious with you. To tell you that I wanted to wait."

"I already knew that you were serious, that we both are serious." Smiling at him she placed a small light kiss on his jaw. "Don't you think that asking me in such a stressful time with Amelia and her arranged marriage was difficult for me?"

"That was the exact reason that I asked you at that moment. To support you, to let you know that I would be there, as your partner."

"But why did you not just tell me that? Silly." Giving him a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth. "You have given me a lot of stress and sleepless nights." The mood was a lot lighter already.

"You call me silly?"

He brought his mouth down to hers quite forcefully and gave her a deep kiss. She gave in after a few seconds and they shared their first real kiss as husband and wife. When Joseph felt that Clarisse tried to pull back to grasp for breath, he pulled her even closer and let his tongue play across her lips, asking for entrance which she gave him after a short silent battle. Both of them losing themselves in the feeling, anticipating for more.

After kissing for a minute or two Joseph finally broke the kiss. "Do you still think that there is something silly now?"

Clarisse shook her head.

"But it still doesn't explain why you proposed to me today. Why not talk it over tomorrow? Why did you want to marry me today?"

Still enjoying the tingling feeling on her lips her answer came a bit later.

"Your letter of resignation."

He kissed her temple. "Yes, for that you have to forgive me. I was hurt and drunk and... stupid. The next morning, I realised my mistake, but I decided to wait until tomorrow to talk with you."

She spoke softly "You once told me that your breakups always end up with a fight or a clean cut."

He stroked her hair and neck while he nodded.

Clarisse continued her explanation. "If I had to make a choice between never seeing you again and losing you or marry you today, the choice was easy."

"Oh Clarisse. I... would you rather have married me...well...later?"

For a moment Clarisse debated with herself if she would keep the truth hidden. But she decided not to, she got a husband today, better not start off with the first lie.

"Yes Joseph, I would rather have married you later. So that we could have talked things trough first, discuss what our life together will look like, to invite your friends to our wedding day..."

"But" He sounded insecure "Are you happy with this? I mean..."

She smiled up at him and kissed him again. Not the deep kiss from before but more like the first one that they shared in this room. Soft and sweet. "Joseph, I am happy being married. I don't want to change it back."

He pulled her close crushing her against his chest, relieved.

"We just have to do this step by step. See how we make this marriage work."

For a while they just stood there sharing kisses, hugging, touching faces, cheeks and arms. Until...

"Clarisse..."

"mhh...yes"

"Are you anxious? For the reactions?" The thought slipped into Joseph's mind and that broke the spell of their safe and warm heaven.

"Only a little. Amelia encouraged me into this you know, trough the earpiece. So, I think she will support us, don't you think?"

Joseph laughed at that. "Ah yes, a fairy tale ending."

"You heard that?" Clarisse sounded surprised but then corrected herself. "Of course, you did, you were wearing such a thing too."

Joseph smiled again but then turned serious, still holding her close. "I meant reactions from the press and parliament actually."

Clarisse sighted. "Well, most parliament members were in the church today. So, they have had their chance to object. And for the press and the people of Genovia I probably should make a statement later, somewhere in the afternoon."

"Someone probably can fit that into the schedule with the reception, dinner and ball this evening. I gather that all those things are still happening?" Joseph did not look too keen on going to all those official meetings.

"Yes, I think we have to brace ourselves for the rest of the day. We need to shake a lot of hands."

Joseph suddenly looked alarmed. "I have to be there too? I mean... I understand that I will be there...but I also have to be there..."

Clarisse interrupted "doing the same job as I? Yes. You are married to a queen now you know."

"Well I'm not sure..." But Clarisse interrupted him again. "Yes, you are. You watched me at official gatherings for years."

She gave him her most brilliant smile.

"You'll do splendidly."


	15. 15 Boundaries

Chapter 15.

I'm sorry that it took me so long to update. At first, I had little inspiration for this chapter. And then I had a weekend off with the family and well...just took me longer than the normal week.

I am reaching the end of this story. Maybe one more chapter after this one. Although I don't know yet what it will be.

For now, a little warning for some mature content, not too much.

**15\. Boundaries**

Joseph watched his wife as she finally waved away the last member of staff that needed her attention for some reason. He knew that she would not be comfortable showing any level of intimacy with others around. So, he managed to constrain himself from kissing and cuddling her since they left the church. But now they were approaching midnight and they were finally alone.

He was dead tired and at the same time as alert as he could be. Here he was. A married man. Finally, at his age! He walked towards Clarisse and he spread his arms as an invitation for her to step into his embrace. Clarisse smiled and let her head rest on his shoulder so that he could wrap his arms around her.

"Your speech was the best."

She chuckled. "Well, we have to wait for tomorrows newspapers in order to make up that balance."

"Yes, I suppose so." He sighted into her hair. A short silence fell, but then... "Clarisse?"

"Yes, Joseph." She leaned into him, enjoying the comfort.

"What are your ideas about tonight?" He asked with some hesitation.

"Mhh." A soft kiss on his neck. "You don't want to make love?"

"Well, actually I would like to, but I don't want to..."

He was silenced with a kiss and then Clarisse whispered, "I am a little nervous, but I have the feeling that once we start kissing... well, that my nerves will disappear."

Kissed were shared. Loving kisses first, soft and sweet. Getting warmed up, feeling and tasting each other's lips. Slowly the kisses became more demanding, turning to desire.

Joseph saw the sofa in the corner of his eye. They practiced kissing on that very same sofa before, but he did not intend to end on the sofa tonight. So, he steered Clarisse backwards towards the bedroom until he captured her body between the closed door and his own body.

Clarisse felt so strangely content and full of desire at the same time while having Joseph so close to her. Leaning against the door his hands running over her arms, neck and trough her hair. Her own hands slid into his jacked and around his back.

She let her tongue wander over his lips and he returned the deep kiss. Pulling her close and pressing her into the door with his body at the same time. Protecting her from the hard wood by holding his hand between the door and the back of her head. Shots of pleasure running through her lower abdomen.

Soon he moved his free hand lower, from her neck to her collarbone and then to her breasts. A small moan of pleasure escaped her. But right at the point that she felt that her nerves were gone completely Joseph stopped stroking her and moved his hand back to her neck and face.

Stroking her cheek, he said panting, "Before we open this door, we need to talk."

Clarisse thought that she could not keep her frustration at bay. She wanted to make love, give into this man, her man, her husband. And now that she finally dared to give into it, he suggested that they talk! But never the less, she said quietly, "We can talk later, tomorrow, let's enjoy this evening for once, without boundaries."

He smiled upon her, still stroking her face. "But I do want to set boundaries. I want to hear what your boundaries are, and tell you mine so that we don't cross them and make it awkward."

For a moment Clarisse did not know what to say, so Joseph continued.

"For example, I don't like anal sex or anything that has to do with extreme bondage or strangling."

A grasp for air could be heard. "You expect me to enjoy something like that!" Clarisse said looking very surprised. Then continuing, "You are really straightforward are you not?"

Joseph listened to her reply while kissing the favourite spot below her ear. "Just tell me sweetheart. What is your no-go area?"

"I... I don't know really." She stammered, holding back while she felt a little ashamed to talk about intimate subjects and because she was distracted by his kisses.

"Clarisse."

"Nothing special."

"Just tell me. Please. I don't want to hurt you." He kept kissing her neck, her collarbone, drifting towards the swell of her breasts.

When she kept silent Joseph offered. "Shall I tell you how I would like to make love with you?" A full kiss on her mouth. "And you tell me if there is anything that you don't like." He grinned. "Or anything that you do like actually."

She nodded in response and held him close. Joseph started to comment what he would like.

"I want to kiss you as we do now and drag each other into the bedroom." He slowly stroked her breasts trough her dress again, finding one of her nipples that became hard under his touch.

"Undress one another, stroking everywhere, kissing everywhere." Clarisse stopped his story for a while because his words were turning her on so much that she just had to kiss him. But Joseph broke it off and continued talking.

"When I say everywhere, I mean everywhere. Kissing, licking, sucking your nipples."

"Don't do that too much."

"Mhh?"

He kept stroking her and it was maddening. She tried to return the favour, but there was just not enough room between their bodies. Her desire was rising with the minute but she managed to say, "Be kind with my... breast... nipples, they are... well... sensitive." A moan again.

His voice got hoarse when he replied, "Noted, I will be careful there."

The only thing that could be heard for a while were the sounds of exchanged kisses and soft moans.

"Joseph? I... can we just stop talking and get to bed? I just want to love you and make love slowly and gentle. I don't care too much about well..."

"About what?" His hand moved towards her lower back and he pulled her against his evidence of desire, which she could now feel against her belly.

"About... who will be on top or anything..." She said quickly. But then continued more slowly and lovingly. "...as long as I can see your face."

Joseph then surprised her by opening the door and leading her inside. Before she really knew it, he started to take her clothes off slowly.


	16. 16 Contentment

Chapter 16.

I'm finally finishing this story. The last chapter is a short one. Thank you for the reviews, favourites and follows.

**16\. Contentment**

Joseph woke up and was temporarily disoriented. His sheets where different as well as the angle at which light came through the curtains. But then he realised, I am in Clarisse's bed. Our bed. We are married, we got married yesterday. When he looked at Clarisse, he noticed that she was awake and watching him.

"Hi..." he said a little shy.

Clarisse moved more towards him until her head rested against his chest. "This is a little strange isn't it?" She sighted and he felt her warm breath on his neck. "Yesterday morning we were still not on speaking terms, and now we wake up together."

Joseph chuckled. "Yes, it is. But you know, I am very happy and very, very content. Laying here with you."

Clarisse propped herself up on her elbow so that she could lean in for a kiss. "Last night was very nice."

Joseph pulled her close and moved his hands under the cover in order to stroke her back. "Mhh...it was. But you know, first times are not the best times if it comes to sex."

Clarisse kissed his chest and he could feel her smile upon his skin.

Then he realised the state of his body nowadays and he sighted. "Although I am happy to try again, I must confess that with old age... well... you know..."

"Your performance is not as quick anymore as it was when you were eighteen?" Clarisse asked while she kept kissing him at the same spot. Soft kisses, warm ones. "I did not notice anything last night."

"No, I was turned on very much. By a certain woman that has been in my mind for a while." He tilted her head with his hand so that he could kiss her on the mouth again. "I don't want to disappoint you."

"Joseph, I love you very much. I'm sure we will figure this out." She kissed him one last time and then she sat up and moved over towards the edge of the bed.

Joseph grabbed her arm to stop her from leaving. "Where are you going?"

"I would like to start our day. There is so much to do, and I'm looking forward to discuss everything." Clarisse smiled at him, freed her arm and walked towards the bathroom.

Joseph was confused by her behaviour, so he called her back. "Clarisse!"

She popped her head around the door. "Yes Joseph?"

"Whatever do you want to discuss? I hope that this isn't about Queen duties."

"Well, I do want to talk about some crown related subjects." She walked back towards the bed and sat down on the edge. "If you need to have a title now that we are married and if you want to take on some duties also."

"That's not why I married you!" Joseph started to get agitated.

Clarisse silenced him by pressing her index finger on his lips. Then she removed her finger and kissed him.

"I mostly look forward to talk about our life in the future." She smiled. "Where we will live. How and when we can go out together." She sounded very enthusiastic. "Maybe you want to introduce me to people that you love. We can visit them."

Clarisse's enthusiasm was promising. So, Joseph suggested, "Can we go on something like a honeymoon?"

Clarisse bit her lower lip. "Well, not right away. With the coronation and... Amelia still needs my support to get started." Then she smiled again. "But I am sure we can schedule something within a month or two."

Joseph grabbed Clarisse's arm again and pulled her on top of him. She stared to laugh out loud and he silenced her with kisses for a few minutes.

"You know. I barely can believe that you really are my wife now. And that even if it takes two months to schedule a honeymoon, I will still be able to be with you for a large part of the day."

Silence fell while they lay there together until Clarisse whispered. "And the nights."

"Mhh?"

"I will be with you during the nights." she repeated.

While Joseph stroked her hair, he replied. "And I am completely content with that."


End file.
